Jay and I had been together for five years when we decided to get married. We met through work. I was a waitress and he was the head chef at a local village pub. It was a light-hearted suggestion. We were watching TV and I turned to him and said, “I'm ready to get married.'' He organized an engagement dinner for us, with the words “Will you marry me?” Scratch cards, that's all.
It's the same attitude we had when we planned our wedding. I watched my friends stress out for months over big white weddings and knew I didn't want to go through that either. Instead, we gave her 6 months to get married on July 15, 2023.
Was it easy to decide where? What could be better than the first place we met? The pub regularly held mini-summer festivals in the fields next door, so I had a chat with the owners. After doing some research, they agreed to work with us to host their first wedding.
Tipi weddings aren't a new concept, but they ditched the traditional sit-down meal and went full on the festival theme. Ensuring guests could eat what they wanted, when they wanted, was a non-negotiable, and given my husband's career, it naturally had to be delicious.
We converted four horse boxes into food trucks, painted them our wedding colors, and created a custom menu for each. One had sushi, another had pizza, the third had Mexican food, and the last had burgers, hot dogs, and fries. My father is a brewer, so he would serve a homebrewed beer with his name to go with the cocktail tower. The champagne was too luxurious.
Since we didn't choose a typical wedding venue, our big day required a lot of DIY. I had to start from scratch. This meant that we could ignore many aspects that traditionally weren't given much attention, but it also meant that we had to take on a lot of the work ourselves. I am fortunate to come from a crafty family. My mother was responsible for the flowers, both the bouquets and tipi decorations, and my aunt designed the stationery, including the wristbands that were made as admission tickets for all the guests. After all, it was an open and publicly accessible field. We also created games ranging from Bingo to his Kerplunk, as well as Welcome His and Menu signs.
I thought a casual wedding would be easier to plan and less stressful, but the opposite was true. The six month schedule didn't help, especially since we both had full-time jobs. I was a user experience researcher for the government and continued to help out at the pub whenever I could. Our wedding would not have happened without the support of our family and friends. At one point, my mother suggested that we abandon the original idea. Her mother was concerned that what I was trying to do was becoming too much. She offered to pay for the “real” venue and the food to be prepped and prepared by her staff, but it wasn't what we had envisioned for our special day. We persevered with Plan A and I'm so glad we did.
Probably the only traditional element of our wedding was my dress. At first she wanted to wear a wide-leg jumpsuit or a floral dress, but the look on her mother's face when I suggested it might have pushed her over the edge. I realized that there wasn't. After all, I am her only daughter and considering how much she helped me with that day, the least I could do was provide her with this moment.
I have always loved the 1920s aesthetic. I decided on this because I was a ballroom dancer when I was younger and loved twirling around in A-line midi dresses. I took a used dress that I liked the bodice to a dressmaker, who made me the skirt of my dreams. It has a flared design with a tulle overlay featuring a delicate polka dot print. I paired it with a pair of well-worn orange Converse trainers.
As the final confetti was thrown, I kicked off the heels I wore to the ceremony and reached for my trainers. I first bought a new pair of white Converse. I always knew the reception was a flat shoe affair, but it just didn't sit well with me. Plus, my orange shoes matched the bunting I made myself to attach the laces to the inside of the teepee.
The dancing continued until 3am, and three bands played in the evening, creating a truly festival-like atmosphere. We live a very laid-back lifestyle and our wedding reflected that. I know I'm biased, but it was truly a great day. I think it's because we stayed true to ourselves.